Sunday, April 13, 2014

Just me

I originally started this blog to talk about quilting but I really haven't been doing that so I have decided that I will talk about all things in my life.  I have been on a long road to realizing that there is nothing wrong with me.  I am sure that I am not the only person to be raise to believe that you have to be a certain way or you aren't normal.  Around eighteen years ago, I started on the road to realizing that I didn't need to conform to be be accepted.  I didn't have to conform to be normal.  And mostly, I realized that conforming didn't make me happy.

First I found the BDSM lifestyle.  That has changed my life tremendously. I know that there are a lot of people that do not understand it.  People want to think that it is a way for people to get away with abusing other people and for people that feel they need to be abused.  That isn't what it is really about but I'm not going to start on that.  I'm sure as I keep writing I will touch on that.  I say what drew me to it.  Of course, I'm not going to deny that the sexual aspects and the playing more than appealed to me.  But the main thing that drew me was all the talk about respect, honesty, and loyalty.  Especially the honesty drew me.  I grew up being lied to most of the time and I was tired of it.  I didn't really believe that people could be honest.  If one's family can't be honest how can you expect anyone else to be honest.  Because of all the lies in my life, I always tried to be as honest as I could.  My family always told me I was too honest.  I kept telling them if they didn't want the truth then don't ask.  I think that they finally learned because they did quit asking.

Next, I quit going to church because I just couldn't believe in that god.  There are just too much that just doesn't fit to me.  It wasn't that I didn't believe that there was a god.  In fact, I believe that there is more than one God.  As I started researching, I came across wiccan and the pagan religions.  They don't worship the devil.  That is just a myth.  But what I really had call to me was the green witchcraft.  I am still learning and doing research. The more I learn the more it calls to me.  I know that the main reason is because nature calls to me which is a large part of the green witchcraft.  You gotta go with what calls to you otherwise you can never be truly happy.

So, what calls to me?  Nature, birds, butterflies and fairies. Yes, I believe that fairies are real.  And why can't they be?  We believe in Gods that we can't see.  I also love to read and sew, especially quilting.

I need to start supper soon so I believe that I am done for today.